:(

Warning: this post won't involve any pictures. It also will have a somber tone.

Last night was a rough night at work. When I got there, you could tell something was off. You could feel it in the air. It's hard to describe, but even everyone's body language just gave it away. Maybe I should give some background.

Working with sick children is a hard job. Some people get emotionally involved. I find myself putting walls up to try to not get involved emotionally. Compartmentalizing or something. Not sure if it is a bad thing or not. Anyway, we had a really sick kid on the floor last night. Well, actually he has been on our floor for a while, multiple times. Everyone knew that he wasn't doing well and we were all doing more "end of life" care. Since we knew it was coming, we were able to make plans and get his family involved and because he spent so much time on our floor he actually wanted to stay there until the time came.

Long story short, he passed last night in the middle of the night. Meanwhile, I had 5 patients to take care of and besides the nurse taking care of him, other nurses were having multiple issues with their patients too (can you say early full moon??). His family was present and he was comfortable but it was still hard. And afterwards we had to do post-mortem care. I have only done it once before in nursing school while working with adults, but I never want to have to put anyone in a body bag EVER again. Especially working in pediatrics.

It was really sad, and he was a really really sweet kid. And I can say that I really really really hate Cystic Fibrosis.

Sorry to be Debby Downer. Will try to be more upbeat for the next post.